Thoughts from someone slightly ahead of his time
I always cared what people would think of me growing up. I guess it’s why I notice things as I’ve become braver, as I age. It’s not so much that I ever backed off my beliefs because of how people would perceive me in my youth. It’s not even that I had many outlandish things to prove to anyone. I just always felt that if I had information to help people, I should share it. I didn’t share much as I figured out the early parts of my life. After the sixth grade I had to transfer schools because I was picked on so badly that I would cry on my walk home. All I knew is that when I excelled at sports, I attracted some more criticism from my peers. My Dad loved coaching my teams, and I think that rubbed some people the wrong way. He wouldn’t let me play travel baseball, so I was an outsider to my local travel teams. He coached my basketball teams too, so going into the seventh grade middle school team I suppose none of those kids wanted me there. They really did a number on my young mind. That’s just how kids are. It really made me internalize my ambitions. The quiet kid with a world of goals. I learned outwardly excelling at something as simple as basketball would attract a hornets nest of critics I never wanted. So, I spent two years playing middle school basketball for a private catholic school — and I was somehow reunited with my Dad as a coach. It was just a temporary refuge, because high school was like sixth grade all over again.
I thought if I was friendlier and less combative to my bullies that things would become better than they had previously played out. Perhaps this time I wouldn’t have to transfer. After all, my first high school was a Catholic school and the bulk of these kids came from private middle schools like me. I found out the hard way that a friendlier and doormat personality led to me being taken advantage of. I was an exceptional student, but not of exceptional stature. I was a runt of the pack my freshman year, no taller than 5'3" and a paltry 94 lbs. Worst of all, I didn’t stand up for myself anymore. My sharing nature led to about 90% of my math class copying off my tests. These people didn’t treat me any better come tryout time for basketball. I made the team, but I was still their bitch. When baseball tryouts passed I really stood out on the field. That attracted even more criticism. I didn’t realize until later, but the groups and alliances made between freshman started with football season in the fall. I wasn’t on football as I never had interest in playing football. I crashed the party by making my freshman basketball team but when I was throwing low 80’s off the mound as a tiny freshman baseball player, I became a magnet for controversy. Even my own catcher hated my guts. He would literally drop third strikes to allow people on base. Skip ahead to junior year, and a 6'2" kid with absolutely no idea where he belonged transferred high schools. Rinse, wash, repeat. Internalize.
Things were coincidentally better for me at this point, because nobody went out of their way to bully me. I wasn’t physically a runt anymore, after a growth spurt and some weight room habits fixed that. Did that come from insecurity? I can’t really say whether it did or not. I knew it would help me as an athlete and at this point baseball was still a love of mine. I didn’t have to help people cheat at my new school either so that was a weight off my chest. I scored a 32 on my second ACT and thought nothing of it. It wasn’t until years later that I realized I could’ve taken a much different path and had things much easier in my 20’s. I stuck with baseball. I signed two professional contracts in the American Association after six orthopedic surgeries and a college coach that tried to sabotage me for chasing better schools out of high school. In the present day I can certainly laugh about those experiences. I no longer care, baseball was just a thing I did. It wasn’t until I finished college that I realized how much I love to research. I loved to write about what I found out. Soon things would come full circle that I would try to write about things that helped people. Next I released a book to help people recover from immuno-deficiencies. I had a knack for compiling the best facts in order to paint a bigger picture. I think this is where I became interested in things that I found promising, and worthwhile in their nature, but were not easily explained — thus turning off people from the opportunity. In cryptocurrencies, the advantage was obvious in making an investment. Once I was certain of the long term payoffs because there was a trail of facts that the planning preceded October 31, 2008 (the “whitepaper”), I started to spread a message.
That brought criticism, even threats in the public domain. I didn’t mind it at this point. I have been through absolutely everything. The psychological games people play are easy to see through when you’ve experienced every form of bullying known to man. Rather than take the bait, I have learned it’s best to spend my time progressing and not regressing. Regression would be getting pulled back into the scrum. Good luck getting a response from me on Twitter if that is your tactic. See, I share things that I am certain of that will help people — from brands thought ‘dead’ to motives of mass media and politicians. I can liberate others with the information I share much in the way I liberated myself from my critics. I don’t have to fight anyone back because I have already won in my mind by finding some really insightful keys to a free future. The things one can find when they are really looking and making decisions for themselves are extraordinary and life-changing. I am no longer running away from the trauma that can come with success, I am reveling in the fact that criticism comes with correctness. Criticism comes with talent. Criticism and opposition come to make you question your basis of thinking. I couldn’t have found more confidence in the past year as I have answered all of my own questions by keeping an open mind and teaching myself the things most people aren’t willing to learn about the world.
I am living in a bubble called Earth and though I look like you and experience the same struggles as you do, I do not think like you. You, being 99.99% of society that believe things on TV, are influenced by advertising, and have not yet been awaken to the grand scheme for whatever reason. I don’t for a second think that I am better than any one of you, but I feel bad for you that you can be influenced to treat each other worse than animals based off the influencer media and the financial agenda shaping our future. It’s lonely inside my thoughts because I have few people that understand them within the simulation called life on Earth. My hope is that someday mass realization and revelation of the things I talk of and see in progress will help humanity ease into the hands of a better future. I have no idea of what an honest Earth would be like. My only hope is pure faith that the engineers of modern society are good. If these people were motivated by greed and pure evil we wouldn’t have cryptocurrencies and penny stocks to invest in — plain and simple.
In the meantime, I’m used to being alone in my thoughts. I will maintain my current course of seeking further knowledge to prepare me for the inevitable burst of this bubble.